Sunday, December 7, 2008

Some Days are Better Than Others

I'm watching a Hallmark movie with my sister right now. The narrator in the movie just said "Hope is a hard habit to break." It made me wonder about my level of hopefulness. How do you know if you're a hopeful person?

Today it has been three months to the day since Matt's accident. Overall I think I'm doing pretty well, but of course some days are better than others. I know I'll feel some degree of sadness every day for the rest of my life, but I feel like I've made peace with Matt's death. I don't know why my life is the way it is now, but I know it is the way it is.

2 comments:

Kristin Coppee said...

Brenda, you're an amazingly strong person. You have to be to go through something like this. It seems so unfair to me sometimes when I think about it. How come you have a great husband who has to die in an accident and I had a terrible husband the first time around that I had to divorce? Why didn't God take my bad husband vs. your good husband? I've thought about this many times. I have another friend whose husband was also killed in a car accident about eight years ago. She and I have often told each other, "I'd rather be in my situation than yours". She'd rather her husband passed than have to go through a divorce and I'd rather take the divorce because I feel I couldn't deal with the grief of losing a husband who was good to me.

I know that life goes on and you get through it and grow stronger and amazing things happen and I know amazing things will happen for you. I didn't know you very well before Matt's accident, but since I have come to discover how spiritually and emotionally strong you are. And I am very humbled.

Brenda said...

Kristin it's so ironic that you said that because I was just thinking exactly that just days ago. I would rather have to survive his death than survive a divorce. He was a great husband. I'm grateful that he was the kind of person where others could see that, too.