Monday, November 8, 2010

A(nother) Public Service Announcement

I've heard it more times than I can count in the past two months..."Why aren't you blogging anymore?" I've felt guilty about it more times than I can count, too, which is kind of lame. For crying out loud...I often shower just to change into a clean pair of jammies, I'm single-handedly ruining all three of my kids and I eat way too many Pretzel M&Ms...I have plenty to feel guilty about without adding blog neglect. (Sidebar: I'm in p90x rehab for the M&M issue. I've had the same bag of Pretzel M&Ms in my pantry for 3 1/2 weeks now. That's a personal best.)

Anyway...I read something online and it's irritating me into blogging submission. Some of you couldn't care less, and that's okay too, but I'm feeling the need to share.

Did you catch that? Couldn't care less. This morning I was reading an article on my AOL homepage. (I'm really more of an MSN girl, but I'm also borderline computer illiterate and haven't investigated how to change it. Another day maybe.) The author made the comment that she "could care less" about a situation in her life. Inside I screamed. I know there are SO many more important issues in the world, but come on. It's bad enough when the general public misuses the phrase. When a "writer" does it, I have to say something.

The actual phrase is couldn't care less. If you incorrectly say "could care less" you're negating the whole premise of your comment. Let me explain:

If I say that I couldn't care less that Jane's boyfriend is cuter than mine--hypothetically speaking, that is not an announcement--I am saying that it is absolutely impossible for me to care any less than I do that my boyfriend isn't as cute as Jane's. That is rock bottom on the care meter, and it is the message that the phrase is supposed to convey: that I absolutely DO NOT CARE. If I say "I could care less", I am expressing that there is room in the universe for me to care less than I do, therefore I CARE at least a tiny bit, which is not what the phrase means at all. If you're ever unsure, think about it like this: I care a tiny bit (could care less) that Jane's boyfriend is cuter than mine OR I don't care at all (couldn't care less) that Jane's boyfriend is cuter than mine because my boyfriend is still cute and he's also a Nobel Prize winner working on a cure for cancer. (Still with the hypothetical.) Couldn't care less.

So you came to my blog because I finally updated it after two months of silence and I ruined your day with my grumpy tirade...and I couldn't care less. Haha I'm joking!!! I could totally care less... ;)