Monday, December 29, 2008

Enlightenment

Gee, it looks like I took the weekend off! I guess I've been busy. I spent most of this weekend getting together with old friends who were in town for Christmas. Like we all go back to the 4th and 6th grades, that's the kind of old friends I'm talking about. Several of them I hadn't seen since high school graduation FOURTEEN YEARS AGO. That's almost HALF MY LIFE. Seriously, that's a long time. Also seriously, no one has changed a bit.

Friday night I had a long talk with my friend Bil about Matt's death. It just may have been one of my favorite conversations since The Accident. During the conversation, Bil said that I seem enlightened since Matt died. Not a compliment a girl hears everyday, ya know? That comment, plus the approaching new year and thinking about doing some new things with my life, got my wondering about something:

If we compare how we see ourselves with how others see us, how different would we be? For instance, I am currently exploring what I want to be when I grow up. I think I know, but it's something I think I would enjoy and be good at based on how I see myself. So I'm wondering what YOU think I should be when I grow up, based on how you see me.

Satisfy my curiosity: post a comment. Even you blog voyeurs who don't like me to know you're there. (It's nothing to feel bad about, I do it too. But indulge me this once, would ya?)

18 comments:

Brooke said...

I absolutely LOVE your quilts!!!! What great idea and I am sure the family will always cherish them.

As for your next request.....although I do not know you as well as some others, (we should have kept in better touch....) I would say.......something with children. You are a fabulous mother (this could be a problem if you do not like other people's children:) Something with social work maybe? You and your children have been through a lot and I think you could really help others. That is just my thinking. Hey, you asked for it! :)

Orr Family said...

Are are too creative to be at a job where someones tells you what to do, and like me I do not think you like to be told what to do. I see you opening up a cute craft shop, either a scrapbooking, paper shop, or a quilting shop. You would make it homey and comfortable. You would share your passion as well as your life, Brenda's Shop! I want to come work with you!!

Orr Family said...

I have to agree, you do seem enlightened, like you know something that without this experience you would have never learned. You seem free for some reason, like you can spread your wings and do anything! You seem happy when some would not even leave their homes. You have three little ones to live for and show them the world! I do not know how I would be in your situation, but I have thought about it as Daniel flies over Iraq every now and then sitting so close to war. What would I do without him, I would try and do something I would not even think of doing if I was with him. I would become someone else, because you have too! You have to grow and learn about yourself, for once you are not Matt and Brenda, you are Brenda. I am excited to see where this phase in life takes you!

Christy said...

I think whatever you decide to do--you'll be great at it! I haven't known you to not succeed in anything you put your mind to.

If I have to venture a guess...I'd say librarian. I don't know why. I think maybe because if I went back to get a Master's, that's probably what I would choose.

- lola jae said...

interesting comment above...librarian...that's what i am. well, "media specialist," but same thing. i don't see you doing that. honestly? i don't see ME doing that, and i'm doing it! i'm trying to grow up too, and looking for a change. what should i do? maybe we should do something together!! ?

natalie said...

You are so gifted with creativity. I haven't been in touch with you for a long time, but I still remember all the fabulous projects you did, and are still doing.
It's a hard question...Something that makes you happy and lets you honor those parts that are the best in you. Not just something that brings a paycheck, but something that brings enjoyment as well. Don't we all want that? I guess I'm not much help!

natalie said...

I just have to say that I think it is so neat that you are still in touch with so many old friends. It is fun to see Shandolynne, Sara and Alicia's blogs and their cute kids. I remember Bil, too. Such a fun, nice guy.

Brenda said...

The problem with being a librarian is that I don't like to touch used books. I'm more of a bookstore kind of girl. Ever see the episode of Seinfeld where George or Jerry takes the book into the bookstore bathroom and it gets red-flagged? I consider ALL library books red-flagged.

Brenda said...

p.s. I need more followers! I want to look like one of those really popular blogs, so I need lots and lots of followers! *hint*

natalie said...

You should attach a site meter (free at sitemeter.com) to your blog. You can see how much traffic you have on your blog and where it's coming from (google searches, friends' blogs, etc). You can also make sure you don't have any weirdos frequenting your site. (I took the kids' names off after my meter showed me a strange middle aged man was coming to my blog several times a day.) I apparently have between 20-40 visitors each day, but I rarely get comments. What's up with that?!

Frankie and Krista said...

Hey Brenda. I just found your blog. It is great to see how you are doing. Alexa said to tell Brigham Hi! I love the blog and your quilts were amazing!

mikim said...

I could see you doing something that allows you to express yourse-whether it be designing, teaching others how to do something, writing-You are such a talented person and have so much to share.

The quilts are beautiful!

Mary Postert said...

How about an EDITOR?

Gardner Family said...

I would have to agree with people in saying something on the creative side but maybe writing. I know with the wisdom you have and what you have gained from Matt's passing would make an excellent book. Call me crazy 'cause I would never have that kind of time but it will also bring to light your creative side in a different aspect. Have a great day!

Julie said...

Do you like to write?

Brenda said...

Mary, I love editing! In fact, a friend of mine just contacted me about editing a book she's working on. I just love to mark all over other people's stuff!

Sami said...

I think an editor sounds so like you! I also see you doing special and fun projects too! I sure miss "Project Night!" I wish I had just a little of your creativity.

Marla said...

Here is a thought, go for the bucks. You have great creative talants that you can always find time and ways to use other than in your career (and they might be more fun if your livlihood doesn't depend on them). You are hyper intelligent and I think you would make a fantastic doctor/nurse anesthetist or lawyer (especially the latter). Not to be greedy, I just think that if you have to leave your babies and work, why not ease the pain with some great compensation?

p.s. so glad I found your beautiful blog, didn't know how to reach you, you are in my prayers and I would love to chat when you have the time.