Monday, September 6, 2010

The Little Things

A couple of weeks ago a woman at church asked me if Seth is close to 2 yet. When I said he'll be 2-years-old next month, she said almost under her breath, "Wow, that went by fast." I knew she wasn't really talking about Seth, it was more of a sudden awareness that it's already been two years since Matt died. We mark that passage of time by subtracting one month from Seth's age. It's been two years tomorrow.
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I was going through some pictures last night, looking for one for another post, and stumbled upon this:





It's a message Brigham wrote on the cover for Matt's casket. It tears my heart out. Sometimes I wish my boys' father was a jerk so they'd actually be better off without him, but he wasn't and they absolutely adored him. He would walk in the door after a full day at work and Brigham and Hunter would run toward his open arms at full speed, often knocking him flat on his butt. Sometimes I was jealous that they got the first home-from-work hug, but after a conversation with Hunter tonight I'm glad.
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We went to the cemetery this evening. Usually the boys don't like to get out of the car, and I don't feel like I should push them, but tonight Hunter sweetly offered to go with me to "our" grave. As we stood together looking at Matt's headstone, Hunter told me he was thinking about Dad at our old house. "What part?" I asked. "About how he used to walk in the door," he answered.
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On the way home I thought about that phrase..."It's the little things that matter most"...and I thought about how quickly the little things can become enormous things. Little things like walking in the door.

14 comments:

Suz said...

So many 'little things.' I'm thinking about you today and tomorrow. You'll be in my prayers...I love ya.

Becky said...

It really is all about those little things, the things we so often take for granted. Underdoggies on the swing, that's one of my little things. I love you and think of you often.

Julie said...

I am thinking of you today and know that this two years has been anything but "Fast". I love you and am in continued aww of your strength even in the most difficult times!! Wish I was there today!

Frankie and Krista said...

Wish I still lived by you! I'm sure we could come up with something to keep seth entertained today :)We are thinking about you!

3M's and an R said...

Brenda, you remain in our prayers. You are a remarkable Lady and I know Matt has his hands wrapped around the four of you and always will- Love Robi and Family

angie said...

such a tender post. I'll be thinking of you guys.

Ryan and Bethany said...

You are in our prayers. I look back on the last 2 years and parts of it feel like it has gone by fast and other things I remember seem so distant and almost in another lifetime. Thank you for your great example of faith and courage.

Erin said...

That is so sweet. I hope he remembers that forever.

katie said...

Brenda,

You and your aweet little guys are always in my thought & prayers. The little things are the best things in life. I try everyday to recognize the little things and acknowledge them. You are wise. You are strong. I love you. Don't forget the little things.

Always,
Katie

dustin and amy said...

Thinking of you...and the little things...Thanks.

Gardner Family said...

It is still hard to believe that two years has in fact gone by so fast. You and the boys are forever in our thoughts and prayers espeically on this day each year. Miss you tons!

Peterson Family said...

I will be thinking of you and your boys' too. Your boys' are so blessed to have such a wonderful father and such a strong, beautiful, and courageous mother. I know that you didn't choose to be THIS kind of role model, but you are a wonderful person and great example to everyone around you. Thank you.

msjazz79 said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
msjazz79 said...

God bless your family and keep you all. Your husband had an amazing talent and from what I've read he has and amazing family as well.